DESK, Huw Federation: Early this morning a general alert was broadcast by the Federation Police informing citizens to stay indoors, the situation was completely under control and that the gigantic tick invading the nation was nothing to be afraid of. The general alert was, however, largely ignored.
`Oh my god!' reports Federation News Commission journalist Robert Lindsay. `We're all going to die! Doom! DOOM!'
The gigantic tick is said to be 500 metres in length, and at least 400 metres in diameter. It is reportedly floating 100 metres in the air. These reports remain unconfirmed, as no body is brave enough to go near it.
`We can, however, hear the thing,' reports Police Constable Julie Pugsworth. `I may be mistaken, but it sounds very similar to the Crazy Frog ring tone.'
The Federation Government has urged citizens to be strong and brave, and has released its unconditional surrender to The Tick.
Crazy Frog ring tone shares have dropped by 50% in the last day.
This is a bit of a wasted entry.
I'm going to bed.
Good night.
DESK, Huw Federation: Federation Police have declared an `elevated status of bewilderment' as to the whereabouts of the Prime Minister, whom no one has seen since Saturday, 7 April 2006.
`Dude... he was, like, over there... I... I think...' says Police Constable Jack Simmonds, the last person to see the Prime Minister. `I didn't see him go anywhere... and I'll take History for $500, please, Larry.
`What? ... I'm supposed to what??? Oh... I screwed it up this time...'
The Police and the Prime Minister were playing Hide and Seek, and nobody has found the Prime Minister yet.
Police Commissioner Matthew Jeffery says that the Federation Police are considering raising the case to `status of befuddlement', or even to 'potentially embarrassing status'.
`We told him not to go passed the row of trees...' says Mr Jeffery. `He must have gone passed the trees and got lost.
`This is almost as bad as the time we broke the window with the tennis ball. Mum was so peaved... Oh, man. If she finds out that we've lost the PM... she'll go spare.'
Additionally, the Prime Minister's Mum says that he's done it this time, he'll be grounded for a week and to just wait until his father hears about this.
Things that were good about it:
- Talking to people before hand.
- Talking to people afterwards.
Things that were bad about it:
- It.
- The fact that some people had to leave 5 minutes afterwards, making my earlier point less `good'.
- My chilli chips weren't chilli enough, and everyone made fun of me.
Anyway, I have a MacBook Pro. It's friggin' awesome. I got it yesterday, the same day I did some other cool stuff which I won't elaborate on because you'll just get bored. Remember the first entry? Made a mission statement in it. Well, I'm not going to provide a URL again...
Totally.
So what was the point of this entry? I hadn't done it in a while. No one fell for my little joke. You guys are all too smart. I'm so proud of you. Well, except for you. That's right... you know who you are...
Right, so back to the point: what was the point of this?
I hadn't given that much thought. Just telling you that I have a MacBook Pro. It's an absolute pleasure to type on, by the way. A pleasure. Maybe that's why I keep typing this blasted entry.
I bet no one is reading up to here.
No one.
Except for you. I'm proud of you. Here, you get a little reward: here you go!
Sick of this crap.
This is the last entry.
